Wednesday, March 3, 2010

ZJ is ZZ Communications' Chief Ideations and Operations Officer

This is the most mediocre email I've ever received. Beyond the below I've made a summary:

  • Full of spelling mistakes
  • Written in 5 different formats (regular, bold, Underline, bold underline and blue)
  • I have never heard the company's name
  • I still can't find the company's website
  • There was no land line, only mobile
  • There was no corporate email, only an @eim account
  • There is a lot of cut and paste
  • There is major repetition, of whole paragraphs not just statements
  • The areas of expertise entail that they have about 700 people on payroll, this is probably three times the size of the fattest consultancy house in the UAE. However, he describes ZZ as "a small consultancy powering big, global ideas"
  • Job title rocks. But at that point why not go for Chief Jedi Officer?
  • FINALLY: The whole premise of my article, which supposedly impressed him, is Brand Dubai's failed communication strategy, yet he goes ahead and asks me to introduce him to ranking Dubai government officials so he can pitch them his masterplan save the day make Dubai strategy - IF I HAD THIS ACCESS, WHY WOULD I CRTIICISE THE ORGANISATION AND MAKE SUGGESTIONS ON HOW THEY CAN IMPROVE IN THE MEDIA???!!!

Mr. Mishaal Al Gergawi
Dear Mishaal,
I write this to congratulate on your superb article "The world is run by those who show up" in Gulf News of 21 February 2010.
In April 09 after Johann Hari fired the first salvo of nasty attacks on Dubai (no doubt inspired by the staccato bursts in other global publications), spinning a puerile yarn, I had written to some of the leading opinion leaders and decision makers on the need to have a unified command and control centre for communications (without sounding scarily Orwellian) to create and disseminate a consistent message about "Brand Dubai." I had strongly recommended that Dubai would have to counter the attacks with an optimal blend of strategic and tactical communications initiatives. I had fervently argued that absence of an effective response, and prolonged silence, would be construed as acquiescence.
In this message mix of strategic and tactical initiatives, integral to the success of the "Dubai" image is a campaign that would efface the earlier negative courage and strongly convey Dubai's positives to a large global audience to drive investments, trade, tourism, business flow into this fantastic city. We, at ZZ, have ideated such a unique, innovative and highly impactful global campaign.
By virtue of the extremely innovative and highly impactful global marketing and business development initiatives that ZZ and I have ideated and presented for some of the best brands in the world like The New York Times and Vodafone, I am extremely confident of bringing innovation, excitement and passion to this project. The "BLAH BLAH" (TM by ZZ exemplar based on "YADA YADA" mooted by ZZ would transform Dubai into a truly global household brand with commensurate benefits in re-vitalising business flow.
We, at ZZ, are extremely confident that this would act as a stimulus that would kick start a renewed resurgence of flow of business, investments, trade and tourism into this great city. To implement this campaign, I am trying to find the right, empowered Dubai Government forum that can review and approve this project that has humungous benefits for Dubai in the short, medium and long term.
Towards this end, I would be grateful if you would proffer your guidance, which I consider would be invaluable.
I had outlined this very briefly when I had the pleasure of meeting with you, albeit very briefly, after your presentation on "Mapping Dubai" at The Shelter.
It was immediately after the excellent presentation. In the blur of post presentation adulation and huddles, I am sure my face would have been just one of the many that slipped into oblivion even before being registered.
May I re-introduce myself as ZJ, Chief Ideations and Operations Officer of ZZ, an integrated business enhancement and marketing consultancy based in Dubai, U A E. It is a small consultancy powering big, global ideas, inspired by MM and the possibilities offered by a truly, inextricably interconnected, global world.
ZZ is knowledge based, information propelled, innovation driven, globally clued on and utilises technologies to create and implement strategy. ZZ is an ardent believer of : Business enhancement through : Knowledge . Information . Technology . Communication . Innovation . Global Ambition.
We have backed up our ambitions with a few, extremely innovative and highly impactful initiatives worldwide.
They cover the spectrum of financial services, media, communications, aviation, marketing, telecoms, infrastructure, tourism, global branding / marketing.
As mentioned earlier, one of the projects that we are passionate about is the unique and innovative global project to transform Dubai / U A E into a truly global household brand and enhance trade, tourism, investments and help Dubai regain its top ranking as a global business hub.
As a committed and loyal Dubai resident of the last 14 years, who is passionate about the success of this city, I am extremely desirous of making this exciting project happen. It would have significant ripple and trickle down benefits to help Dubai kick-start its ascendancy to its deserved slot at the top.
In the interim, I attach a snapshot on the integrated business enhancement and marketing consultancy, ZZ. It is a small consultancy powering big, global ideas, inspired by MM and the possibilities offered by a truly, inextricably interconnected, global world.
We have also identified, ideated and initiated several other projects globally, regionally and locally.
  • For example, we at ZZ have ideated how to transform one of the largest telecom operators in the world to be one of the most admired brands in the world. This business enhancement / marketing initiative could be a significant differentiator as emerging economies like India transform from a 500 million unit market to a 1 billion telecoms market in just 4 years. This is the differentiator between a zilch to zillion market. This extremely interesting, innovative, global and highly impactful initiative has been presented to the Global Brand Headquarters of one of the largest telecom operators, in their European Headquarters.
  • ZZ and I have presented to the C E O of The New York Times , a business re-structuring / global business development strategy to turn them profitable. This would transform them from a loss making unit to a globally admired profit making unit.
  • On a totally different level, we have ideated and formulated ways of transforming India into one of the greatest granaries of the world. It is unique and massively impactful in that it creates massive opportunities in environmental protection, creation of jobs, alleviation of poverty etc.
  • We, at ZZ, have also found ways on how emerging world governments can save billions of dollars in healthcare expenditure
  • We at ZZ are extremely confident that we have ready to market, zero gestation period projects that will help clients across many segments boost profits significantly.
More on some of the projects ZZ has pro-actively identified, ideated and initiated :

1) The New York Times project : ZZ pro-actively identified an opportunity, initiated dialogue with the Chairman and C E O of The New York Times and presented a business restructuring / global marketing campaign to the C E O of The New York Times at their headquarters in New York. Some of the key recommendations in the strategy have already been implemented by The New York Times. But the real game changers, as recommended by ZZ is yet to be implemented. At ZZ we are extremely confident that this is the only way forward for global publications to survive. The "BLAH BLAH" (TM by ZZ exemplar based on "YADA YADA" mooted by ZZ would transform a multimillion dollar loss making venture into a global leader with commensurate profitability.

2) Global Marketing / C S R project for one of the largest telecom operators in the world : ZZ ideated an extremely innovative, technology based, global marketing / C S R campaigns for one of the largest telecom operators in the world. ZZ the concept and strategy at their European Headquarters in Ireland. This, again, is a multimillion dollar project which will transform this organisation into one of the most admired in the world with commensurate revenue returns. This project assumes added importance as emerging markets are slated to double their mobile telephony capabilities over the next few years (India set to double its 500 million in just 4 years !!!)

3) Multimillion dollar integrated global marketing campaign to transform local / regional brands / destinations into truly global household brands : ZZ has ideated and introduced a very innovative and exciting integrated global marketing campaign which will transform local and regional brands into truly global household brands to blue chips and governments of the region. This could also double as a massive global destination / city / country branding project which could drive trade, tourism traffic and investments, even in these tough times.

4) Global business development and strategic marketing with a leading payments brand : Have initiated, globally, with one of the biggest payment brands, an exciting and ambitious global marketing campaign to smother their competition.

5). Introduction of a new aviation revenue concept : In addition, ZZ also working on introducing a new aviation industry revenue addition concept to the major airlines of the region

6) Business Process Re-engineering for optimisation of marketing investments : With most corporates under massive cost pressures, impacted adversely by the downturn, ZZ has ideated and initiated an innovative B P R of marketing processes, which would save millions of dollars for corporates through enhanced cost - efficiencies

7) Unique Television Programming Content : We have ideated unique and interesting "infotainment" concepts for television across many markets.

This is only a sampling of what we have done. As mentioned we have ideated several other, highly remunerative projects in financial services, media, communications, aviation, marketing, telecoms, infrastructure, tourism, global branding / marketing.

ZZ's expertise covers the complete spectrum of :

¨ advertising ¨ business ideation ¨ business development ¨ branding (re-branding) ¨ corporate social responsibility ¨ country social responsibility ¨ content software ¨ content strategy ¨ databases ¨ destination branding ¨ digital marketing ¨ direct marketing ¨ editorial ¨ events ¨ global marketing ¨ image and perception audit ¨ marketing ¨ marketing audit ¨ media consultancy (format, content, platforms, delivery, distribution, style book, marketing) ¨ multimedia ¨ networks ¨ new media ¨ project ideation ¨ public relations ¨ sales ¨ sales audit

¨ syndications ¨ training (sales, marketing)

Look forward to hearing from you.

Yours sincerely

Chief Ideations and Operations Officer
Dubai, U A E
Tel: +971 50 000 0000


Blogger Mazhar Mohad said...

Is this new era spamming?

Friday, March 05, 2010  
Anonymous Angelika Lancsak said...

..a mind like an unguided bullet:-)

Friday, March 05, 2010  

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